How to Increase Your Confidence


How to Increase Your Confidence

4 minute read | By Garry Crosby | Building New Skills | Published: 23/11/2023


Confidence: The Power of the Three C’s

Who’s the most confident person you know? When you watch them in action at work, in a sporting session, or socially, what is it about them that leads to their confident persona?

If you watch closely, you might be able to spot some of the 3 C’s – Competence, Connectivity and Control. In this article, I’ll explain how I think confidence can be built, step by step, by anyone, in any setting.

In business and leadership, confidence is a key element of world-class executive presence. It’s not just about having an aura of assurance, but about cultivating a deep-rooted sense of self-belief that empowers you to lead with conviction.

This belief is not innate; it’s built over time through a framework I call the ‘Three C’s’: Competence, Connectivity, and Control.

Competence: Mastering Your Domain

Let’s start with Competence. Confidence is closely tied to your knowledge and experience in your field. It’s about knowing your subject inside out, being up to date with the latest trends, and mixing in your experience.

This isn’t just about accumulating facts; it’s about understanding the nuances of your industry, the subtleties of your role, and the complexities of the challenges you and your organisation face.

Think of a time when you were asked about a topic you knew thoroughly. Remember the ease with which you answered, the clarity of your thoughts, and how naturally confidence accompanied your words?

That’s the power of competence. It’s about being so well-versed in your subject that even in the face of challenges, your belief in yourself remains solid.

Connectivity: Building Strong Bonds

Next, Connectivity. This is about the relationships you cultivate with your team, peers, and network. Strong connections are a bedrock of confidence.

When you know you have a support system, a network of people who understand you, believe in you, and are willing to back you up, it naturally boosts your confidence.

Connectivity is about more than just networking; it’s about genuine deep relationships built on trust, mutual respect, and understanding.

It’s about creating an environment where ideas are shared openly, feedback is given and received constructively, and everyone feels valued. That sense of belonging and mutual support is a powerful confidence booster for you.

Control: Steering Your Course

Lastly, let’s talk about Control. This isn’t about micromanaging every aspect of your life or work but about understanding and influencing the factors that can impact your success.

It’s about anticipating potential pitfalls and preparing for them, managing the environment you’re in, and maintaining self-control to maximize your physiological and psychological confidence.

Control involves setting clear goals, creating actionable plans, and being proactive rather than reactive.

It’s about understanding your emotions, managing stress, and maintaining a balance that allows you to perform at your best. When you have control over your actions and environment, you reduce uncertainty, which is a major contributor to anxiety and self-doubt.

Integrating the Three C’s

Now, imagine integrating these three elements into your leadership style. You have the Competence to make informed decisions, the Connectivity that fosters a supportive network, and the Control to steer your course effectively. This integration is what makes a truly confident leader; here’s how:

  • Deepen Your Knowledge: Continuously learn and update yourself in your field. Attend workshops, read relevant literature, and engage in professional discussions.
  • Nurture Relationships: Invest time in building and maintaining meaningful relationships. Be genuine, listen actively, and show appreciation for your team and peers.
  • Set Clear Goals: Know what you want to achieve and set realistic, measurable goals. Break them down into manageable steps.
  • Prepare for Challenges: Anticipate potential challenges and plan for them. This could be as simple as rehearsing for a presentation or as complex as developing a contingency plan for a project.
  • Manage Stress: Develop a routine that helps you manage stress. This could be exercise, meditation, or a hobby that helps you unwind.
  • Reflect and Adjust: Regularly reflect on your actions and their outcomes. Be open to feedback and willing to make adjustments.

Confidence is not just about projecting an image of self-assurance. It’s about building a foundation of competence, fostering strong connections, and exercising control in a way that aligns with your values and goals.

By focusing on these three C’s, you can develop a form of confidence that is not just skin-deep but woven into the very fabric of your leadership style.

Remember, confidence is a life-long improvement journey, not a destination. It grows with each step you take, with every challenge you overcome, and with each relationship you nurture. So, embark on this journey with an open mind, a willingness to learn, and a commitment to grow.